Sunday Sayings – Confidence

happy smile-beach

Confident people have it easy in life. At least they appear to. Nothing seems to be much of a problem or obstacle to them. But is that self-assurance always confidence or is it a little more complicated than that?

Having confidence is not

“They will like me”

Confidence is

I will be Fine if They Don’t”

Princess Marthe Louise of Norway

Eleanor Roosevelt seemed to think so too.

You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.     

Eleanor Roosevelt

Confidence comes from the certainty of being able to confide and trust in someone. Having the self-assurity that you are right, morally and personally or functionally.

Remember this advert?

We might feel confident in our skills. We don’t think about them, if we are confident. We just get on and do them.

Confidence is defined as:

‘the feeling or belief that one can have faith in or rely on someone or something or,

the telling of private matters or secrets with mutual trust.’

A big smile and a calm unflappable nature exudes confidence by others.

They trust that you can handle yourself. People glean much more body language than they realize, by reading other people’s state of mind through the way they carry themselves or their own unique body language.

The meaning of confidence seems to have morphed into something more like what could be described as over confidence, an ability to handle multiple social situations. Depending on the tone of the conversation, it might even mean:

  • Cockiness
  • Hidden insecurities behind bravado
  • Natural interpersonal skills

How would you describe someone who has confidence?

I would love to hear your thoughts.

Something to Ponder About

66 thoughts on “Sunday Sayings – Confidence

  1. Amanda, I am always surprised by the number of people who seem confident say to me, that they feel don’t anything but are trying to just go positive, outing and get in with life in general! We are all so many people within the one body, portraying ourselves differently depending on the circumstances and people around us! 😀😀

    Liked by 2 people

      • I think it’s a mixture of the two … for instance if I am doing a talk in front of many people I will give myself a ‘pep’ talk, to help give me the extra confidence to go ahead. But without some inherent confidence in the first place I would not even consider it.

        Liked by 2 people

      • I hear that public speaking is the number one fear for so many, around the world, Annika. We are a judging species and somehow this judging must have given us an advantage in life. Many of us work hard trying not to be ‘judgmental’and not to judge others, yet our education system encourages this type of analysis. Is it good or bad? If bad, why? What motivates the bad and the good folk etc. We are trying to understand each other. In light of this, it is interesting to ponder why we are so scared of being judged. Is confidence then an innate or learned response or a bit of both? Can one learn not to worry about what others think, given awareness and innate confidence, in a similar way to you giving yourself a pep talk to get rid of nerves?

        Liked by 1 person

    • Ah, the tricksters are at the extremes of confidence, aren’t they, Peggy? Never a doubt in their mind that they are correct, right and true. Perhaps this is why some are so convincing because they lose sight of the boundary between truth and lies? Then again it is all about manipulation and control of others for them too.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Eleanor Roosevelt Roosevelt’s quote is sooo clever ! – but it’s the Princess’ quote that I like best.
    I just talk to everyone as if I know them. Works without fail ! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • The Princess communicates that she has mastered self confidence. But expresses it wisely, don’t up think, M-R.
      I had to replace an image from the post, as it didn’t load on the mobile format. Do yo have AMP loaded?

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Difficult question but I’ll try to define it. Confidence is having a good sense of who you are [self-awareness] plus trusting your ability to gauge any situation [experience] tempered by the ability to not take yourself too seriously [humility].

    Liked by 2 people

    • Ooh, I like this. You have encapsulated the aspects of confidence succinctly. If someone had all that together, might one also label this charisma? (Not that I am a fan of labels, but merely using that term for the discussion. Or does charisma have something added; more than just confidence, Ally?

      Liked by 1 person

      • I’d say that charisma is something more than confidence. To me charisma suggest being the zeitgeist of the times. Being the embodiment of what people want to be and therefore having more sway over them. For good or bad.

        Liked by 2 people

      • Charisma: Zeitgeist of the times. Interesting. I thought of charisma as being a special quality of attractiveness, but perhaps it is!also time/era dependant. I would have to think more about that. Confidence being a separate quality to charisma. Hmm, charisma seems more unique, less frequently seen in society, than confidence. To quote the dictionary definition, charisma is ‘compelling attractiveness that inspires devotion,’ so perhaps charisma is a level above confidence, after all? I doubt that any charismatic individual could outwardly lack confidence.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Yes knowing they are good at it and maybe also not having to talk to others much.. We can all be confident in some situations and not others.. Some people are just confident no matter what.. 😉

        Liked by 2 people

      • Honestly some times I think it comes from their parents.. If your parents boost you continually in the right way and surround their kids with support it really bodes well for confidence.. They just know they are beautiful and that they can do it.. 😉 I wasn’t able to do that with my kids.. ;-(

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  4. Confidence is what I feel, when I walk the path illuminated by the living flame in the center of my soul…

    My other heart expresses it somewhat differently though: confidence is being sure, that whatever crops up he will be able to handle it – somehow.
    Cockiness, on the other hand, is like that kind of confidence + the (misguided) belief that nothing could ever go wrong! 😀

    Without a doubt, confidence is very personal thing however – and we may each of us experience and feel it in different ways.

    I have great confidence, that your week will be beatiful and inspiring, dear Amanda! 🙂 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • You nailed a great definition of cockiness, Elena. This is over-confidence, more than enough for what is required.
      I agree it is very personal and perhaps the people surrounding us at any given time can also influence our feeling of confidence or lack thereof. I can feel intimated amongst a group of super confident people!
      Worries interfere with confidence, don’t they?

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I really like your beautiful blog. A pleasure to come stroll on your pages. A great discovery and very interesting blog. I come back to visit you. Do not hesitate to visit my universe. A soon.

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  6. Confidence is good, but so is doubt. It’s about a balance between them, and maybe the right timing. Too much confidence, and Shaw will tell us “The whole problem with the world is the fools and fanatics are always so sure of themselves, and wiser people are full of doubts.” 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • Hey, excellent point, E.W. Those that are so sure they are 100% right are often not smart enough to realize their memories or choices are fallible. There is wisdom in letting go of the need to be right, even if history shows that you are. Confidence in being right is flawed as that person closes their ears to opposing views.

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    • “…Neither is anyone else” – that is the key. Just the single thought that others are better than your, plays tricks with your self confidence, I think, Alejandro. It is best to understand that is a doubt – not reality.

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  7. I find it interesting, in this blogging situation where body language is excluded, actually in any written online communication, how confidence comes across. It’s my personal favourite. Possibly I get it from books, where authors exude their confidence in the best way possible too. And when I meet people whom I met through their online words first, I’m never wrong. In this way confidence cannot be faked.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Thanks for this. I love Eleanor Roosevelt’s comment – I agree. While we worry about what others think of us, they are too busy worrying what others think of them to notice what we’re doing.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thanks for your lovely comment, Library Lady. It is a realization that takes some time for all of us to absorb. Curious really, when it is quite logical. I felt quite liberated when I finally understood this. I think I was in my thirties when it dawned on me. What about you?

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Several years ago I learned actress Katherine Hepburn once said that it never occurred to her to doubt herself, and I thought, “Liar!” EVERYONE doubts themselves at one time or another in their lives. Some are just better at covering it up than others. The key is to replace that doubt with a greater sense of personal confidence and self-worth.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Obviously, Katherine Hepburn was a consummate actress! I think actors have to have that level of confidence to perform roles other than themselves! To put on another ‘hat’ and be convincing is to be confident in your imitation.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Katharine Hepburn may have been a good actress from some perspectives, but I feel she was overrated for the most part. In every role, we know it’s her portraying the character. She never really “acted”; she more or less “behaved”. There IS a difference. Hepburn once criticized fellow actress Meryl Streep. But Hepburn had nothing on Streep, as far as I’m concerned. I’ve seen most of Streep’s movies, and although we know it’s her, she gets so deep into the character that she’s almost unrecognizable. The late actor Philip Seymour Hoffman once said, if we don’t recognize him in a particular role, then “I’ve done my job.”

        That’s actually why, in old Hollywood, Hepburn was often denounced as “Katharine of Arrogance”. In the 1936 movie “Mary of Scotland”, she portrays the title character. An old story states that, throughout the film’s production, Hepburn repeatedly said she could play both Mary and Elizabeth Tudor (Elizabeth I). Someone (I believe it was John Huston) finally said, if she did that, she wouldn’t know which character to upstage!

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      • Intetesting. I have only seen Hepburn in, Who’s coming to dinner?’ So I should not really comment on her performance, as an actor. But I do how what you mean by getting so deep in the character, the audience forgets they are acting. I have this problem ding that with Nicole Kidman, in her movies. I’m always thinking and judging her acting skills except for one movie. I think it was called, ‘the hours.’ That was the only one where I forgot she was acting and felt she was really into the character, she was portraying. She was actually portraying a ghost in that movie. Hah! What does that say? Lol.

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