Why do we think negatively when we know better? "If I expect the worst, I am pleasantly surprised when something turns out well." Such an approach to life situations, is modus operandi for some members of my family. I do get why people do get into the habit. I used to do this myself. Some… Continue reading Playing the Devil’s Advocate
I find there to be profound wisdom in proverbs, sayings and quotes and I marvel at the way they are so succinct in communicating messages to the reader. Mostly anonymous, they come to us from past generations and from across cultures. They speak of the experiences of lives lived and lessons learned. Valuable life lessons. … Continue reading Proverbial Thursday – Global Words of Wisdom
Do you sometimes feel misunderstood, or like you just don't fit in? Is socializing painful or something you avoid? Is mixing at a party or large group a torturous experience? If so, you could be suffering from social anxiety? People suffering with this are often introverted by nature and feel that they are constantly being… Continue reading Do You Fit In? Anxiety, Emotions and Friends
Socialising does not come easily for everyone. As hard as they try.... For some people, social anxiety and harassment comes hand in hand and bullying can take place at school, home and in the workplace. How they cope or don't cope with it, can have a huge impact on their lives. My son is still… Continue reading How to Stop Worrying about What People Think – social anxiety and bullying
Conversation, How to meet and talk with New People. Useful Opening Questions for Social Skills and sufferers of Social anxiety
Marc and Angel talk about: Cutting out negative habits. This can make it simpler to foster good relationships by getting to the heart of productive communication, so why not start today? 1. Focusing on your inner monologue instead of the dialogue in front of you. When someone is talking to you, you might be thinking: … Continue reading Negative Social Habits that Impede Communication
Why do we think negatively when we know better?
Because thinking negatively, expecting “the worst,” seeing the downside of positive situations, and even downright expecting failure, all convey a kind of backwards-thinking, emotional insurance policy. It goes something like, “If I expect a tragedy, then I won’t be disappointed when it takes place.”
Our desire to want to be right is another common reason we subconsciously choose negative thinking. Sometimes, as foolish as it sounds, we would rather be right about our negative predictions than have a positive outcome prove us wrong. And since negative thinking leads to negative actions, or no action at all in many cases, by thinking negatively we create a self-fulfilling prediction for ourselves. In other words, we think negatively, predict a negative outcome, act negatively, and then receive a negative outcome that fulfills our prediction.
It is all too common. We make comparisons, with other people around us, other people who we perceive to be more confident, more successful, happier, than we are. It is a trap that perpetuates an internal struggle with insecurities.