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Getting Old

Forestwood

It happened quite suddenly.

The feeling that the Moth, (Man of the House), and I are becoming a bit…. old.

I shouldn’t be surprised, as this feeling isn’t really that new.

I first felt like this, when I turned thirty years old. How silly was I then? But of course, 30-year-olds don’t always have any point of reference for what older age really feels like, until now.

We feel our age a little more, every time a milestone passes. You know the sort where we get to celebrate yet another 12 wonderful months of life on this planet? Except you reach a point where you don’t want to celebrate the number, anymore. It is almost a forbidden word once you pass three score years, which I haven’t quite reached yet, but the Moth most certainly has.

Today, however, I did feel extra old, particularly when the Moth asked me a question and the ensuing conversation went like this:

“Have you seen that blue cold pack from the freezer?”

“No, should I?” (have seen it?)

“I just had a look and it isn’t there.”

“Are you sure?”

“You know – the blue one.”

“I’ve never seen a blue cold pack, but I did see an orange one there, last week.”

“Yeh – the orange one.”

(Sigh). “Yeh, it’s in there.”

“Where?”

“In the freezer?” [Long Pause].

“What’s in the freezer?”

“The Orange Cold Pack.”

“No, it’s not.”

“Have a look.”

“I did. It’s not there.”

“Well, have another look.”

“I did. It isn’t there.“

“Check again.”

“Oh – there it is. I’ve found it!”

(sigh)

And there we have it. It is official.

Suddenly we are old.

Published by Forestwood

A philosophic Aussie writes here at StPA, one who will readily admit to loving Scandinavia. I'm interested in global politics and what drives us to be who we are. Scratch the surface and you'll find a practical Environmentalist with an egalitarian bent, trying to unleash a little creativity via the written word. Scandinavian culture, literature and traditions are close to my heart, even though I'm Australian. Travel and courteous discussions greatly broaden the mind, so I travel if I can and am always up for a vigorous, respectful discussion. I'm an avid reader, a writer and I enjoy photography and crafts, particularly traditional art forms. I hope you'll find 'Something to Ponder About,' in my WordPress Community.

113 thoughts on “Getting Old”

  1. Please don’t be concerned. It’s a well-known fact that men of any age cannot find anything unless it’s directly under their noses, and sometimes not even then!

    Liked by 5 people

  2. Hihihi … this sounds familiar. We often repeat this exchange: Me: Did you see my wallet?” He: “Yes, I saw it on the counter last week …” (I’ve used it every day since then!!) – But re: feeling old. I’ve never connected it with an age. Turning 30. Didn’t faze me. Turning 60 didn’t faze me. Being married for 5 years (when I was 25) really gave me the creeps. And then again, the 30th wedding anniversary … 🙂

    Liked by 5 people

      1. It probably just meant “a huge number” and it had to do with my general feeling at the time. By the time the 40th came around I was resigned to the number. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      2. A 30th anything sounds ‘big,”but the leap to a 40th somehow doesn’t seem so bad.
        Acceptance is a wonderful gift we can give to ourselves. I should also take my own advice.

        Liked by 2 people

    1. It seems that it must be true, Sam – The man look IS a real thing Yet, the Moth is always the one to find the things that I have put in a,’ safe place’. One so safe that no one can find it easily. No man looks then, but at other times…..

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  4. I have been thinking that I’ve just passed some kind of watershed: I sat on my little plastic seat from Bunnings and weeded for an hour or so during the week, and have been scarcely able to walk since. I last did this about five or six months back, and had no after-effects.
    Arthritis in my hands now causes occasional shooting pains. Just as well I’m isolated: my language is not the .. ahh .. best. 😀

    Liked by 3 people

      1. H’indeed ! I do like that word, ‘aggravating’ .. When I was at school, it was said to me quite a lot. [grin]

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      4. Re: blindspot under the nose. It’s a thing. No, it really is. I talked to an occupational therapist who works with children and she told me that children who loose a lot of weight have a problem that they don’t “see” things below their waist, i.e. they might be pretty well organised and keep their stuff tidy on shelves etc. but will not tidy on the floor and overlook things that have fallen down. They have to learn to see past their non-existent bellies. I’m sure this applies to adults as well (even the ones who still have the belly!).

        Liked by 1 person

  8. Oh, I feel you with this one. I looked in the mirror a few weeks ago and realized I look old now, not sort of late middle-aged, but old. And I ache in more places than I care to admit. And I don’t pay attention to my birth day like I once did. On the flip side at least I’m still here and kicking, as are you, so that’s good, right?

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Yep. I am still here, Ally. And I will be kicking for as long as I can. It is strange that we should give up on the birthdays. They used to be a highlight. But just seem trouble now. I also agree the mirror can be a spiteful enemy some days. I suggest dimming the light in that room. It helps.

      Liked by 1 person

  9. I have this conversation with women in my life just it is the roles are reversed. I have stopped age counting and growing older is not fun. I still think I can do physical things I did when younger. When I bend down to tie my shoes, I also wonder what else can I do now I am down here.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Lol. That is wisdom, Brian! Economy of movement. Eminently sensible ! I like it. Why not make the most of your ‘down’ time. Sorry – that is a bad Dad joke….

      Liked by 1 person

  10. I am approaching that 3 score point. One more year to go. In earlier days, I would say that old was 30, much like you. However, I started moving my definition of old from 30 to 40 to 50 to 60 and beyond. Of course, I have gone to the definition that old is merely a state of mind, not a yearly age. My mind agrees with that definition. However, I find that my body doesn’t always go along with that definition.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The body can be a recalcitrant beast at times. Dr Stanley! We must rail against the body that tells us it cannot do this and that, and modify the way we CAN do things! Are you planning to celebrate the milestone of three score years?

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  11. Uhm, yes and no. You should know by now that men have an innate inability to see objects in a refrigerator or freezer 😉 (Actually, I do at least 50% of the cooking, maybe more, so I somehow overcame this male-oriented disability) Of course, the orange or blue cold pack thing? OK, I’ll grant age there 😉

    Liked by 2 people

    1. So colour blindness or colour confusion, is age-specific, Trent! That explains it. It does seem that men cannot always see things in the fridge in the same way women do, but beer or alcohol must be exempt, as it (pardon the Aussie expression), ‘stands out like dog’s balls’, regardless of gender!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. lol, I forgot about the beer in the refrigerator thing. Maybe my theory about the Y chromosome and ‘fridge-blindness needs a little work. Color confusion – great, another thing to worry about. I’m in my mid 50s and in most ways am in the best shape of my life, but my eyes, well, I don’t see like I did when I was 20 😉

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Isn’t that frustrating, Trent! Our eyesight does take a hit from 45 years on, it seems. Then in our fifties, we became slaves to the, “Where are my glasses?” game. I guess we could chalk it up to character building challenges! I don’t think everyone is afflicted by colour confusion, only my husband!

        Liked by 1 person

  12. Um, I’ve not been seeing things right under my nose all my life. And now you’ve told us how old you are, I can tell you that neither of you is remotely old. I’m not in my mind either, and I’m more than 10 years older than you.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Interesting that you have noticed this centrally oriented blindness all your life. I cannot say that I have that problem, but the Moth definitely has! Particularly if I am waving out at a distance in the shopping centre. He looks to his left and right but not straight ahead! I could never work out why! Perhaps it is genetic?

      Liked by 1 person

    1. This doesn’t bode well for the future, Khurt. I shall have to develop more patience. Age must affect the word-finding centre in our brain. As writers, I don’t like the sound of it, at all.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I haven’t stopped over at your blog for some time, Non Sm. LadyBug. I am sorry for that. And even though I have been following you for years and years, I have never known your name and found it on a comment on your blog just now! So Bridget, you most definitely can use the term MOTH,for your other half. I contemplated with MATH (Man About the House), but it sounded too much like a Scandinavian version of Mathew.
      I can’t remember when I first came across the term. I was looking for a way to refer to my husband on this blog, without infringing on his personal privacy. How long have you been blogging now? Would it be, like me, close to ten years? (even though I was not very active for the first three)

      Liked by 1 person

  15. I’m still trying to figure out what changed in our conversational exchanges. We used to pick up clues about the subject at hand. Now one of us will ask, “What on earth are you talking about?”

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh, Anne. I feel you pain! The Moth often chats to me at length about the “thing.” What thing? I ask and get something like, Well you know ( fingers gesticulating wildly), that thing you had. I am constantly rooting around in my memory for what tool/implement/note I may have had. Very frustrating, but it sounds like it is par for the course as we age! When did you first notice it ? And does it have anything to do with retirement?

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      1. I think our vague talking without a stated subject began a year or two ago. I’ve been retired for six years, John for seven. Since I noticed it, I try to make sure there is a noun in my opening sentence. I’m also aware that my hearing is failing slowly. These things could explain why we sound like idiots when talking together.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. A noun in the opening sentence. Good idea, Anne. As long as that noun is not “thing” – hehe! And thinking more before I speak. I might try that.

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  18. I myself am retired now. Occasionally I’ll pick up one of my old high school math books to challenge myself. The last several years I’ve tutored a few students on their college algebra, only to learn that some of those methods have incredibly evolved– to where I had to update myself on how some math problems are solved today. My current physical strength certainly shows my age. Now, if I’ve got a 20″ or larger terracotta dirt-filled pot I need to put elsewhere on my property, I use a dolly instead of muscling even 10 feet with it. The weirdest thing is seeing old photos– the way we were. But, hey. I’m enjoying these “Golden Years.” Peace.
    Art

    Liked by 3 people

    1. I love the term Golden Years, Art! They are precious! We never know how long they will last or in what form they will take. I shared a video of a lady in Ireland recently who spend the best part of her early adult life caring for her father who was bedridden for 17 years! I do hope that we don’t suffer the same fate. I think you definitely need to use that dolly for jobs like that. Even the youngest girls at work are drilled not to use their backs for these tasks, as it is the cumulative strain of lifting things like this that does the most damage to one’s muscle and soft tissue structures. I dislike looking at younger photos of myself and get all nostalgic about seeing my kids as little ones. It is a double-edged sword, this aging thing. Knowledge is rarely static. Some fields more than othes require updating. Even maths changes it seems. They don’t even bother teaching kids how to do long divisions sums anymore.

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      1. I once had an industrial inspector job, during which I had to use a calculator to perform square roots. One of my fellow workers said to me, “Wouldn’t it be cool to be able to do these by hand with pencil and paper?” I told him that you can’t make a calculator function without being able to do it long hand first. He didn’t believe me– so I performed one for him– and he was so shocked. Yup. Lotsa stuff isn’t taught these days, including script writing.
        Art

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Also in Australia, cursive or script writing is a dying skill, Art. Once you got the hang of division and multiplication in your head by rote learning, long division was methodical, systematic and reasonably easy.

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  20. I can appreciate what he went through. I walked out to the car earlier today to get something out of the glove box. But when I got there, I couldn’t remember what I wanted. I had to return to the house, take off my shoes, and sit down on the couch in order to remember. – Marty

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Isn’t that the most annoying thing, Marty? I experience that too! And I absolutely hate that I have forgotten it. I used to think it was something to do with too much on my mind, but now I think it has to be short term memory starting to slip a disc. It does come back to me, but the synapses are working slowly, and I rail against that thought of what it will be like in ten years time. At what age did these incidents first appear to you?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Probably at age 27, Amanda. 🙂 I suspect it probably started around age 55 or so. So far I’m not noticing it being serious because I assume it would be pointed out to me more if it was! But, yes, I do think it has a lot to do with short-term memory. And so it goes…

        Liked by 2 people

  21. Been there, done that. Enough said. Yesterday, at the end of my daily walk, I was thinking how I hadn’t taken any photos in nearly a week only to get home and realize I’d taken some about an hour earlier!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Well then I am in good company then, Graham. My daughter often says, Mum, you told me that already? I have to cover it up with some feeble, half-hearted excuse as it happens far too often for my liking!

      Liked by 1 person

  22. lol, I love the term Moth, readers digest had a funny section called moth. I think it was called moth. haha. I have been forgetful my whole life (Dad was a Vietnam vet, I have other health issues as well as a result, no drama) the funny thing is it got worse after having kids lol, as every Mum can relate. Now my Mum & I have the funniest conversations especially since her strokes. I love getting older, I am totally justified in being more & more eccentric. My 50th I received a rainbow coloured tutu & fishnet gloves which I wore with my overalls & a princess party hat.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. I like your sense of style! Eclectic, not eccentric, we should call it! Lol! We can get away with more things under the excuse of forgetfulness, WiAnH.
      Seriously though, we would be better served to laugh at ourselves instead of feeling frustration towards one’s spouse for doing, or forgetting, what so many other older people do. There are other times when a bad memory is a useful asset.

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  23. cathynative77@gmail.com Pastor Cathy Native

    On Fri, May 1, 2020 at 4:58 AM Something to Ponder About wrote:

    > Forestwood posted: ” It happened quite suddenly. The feeling that the > Moth, (Man of the House), and I are becoming a bit…. old. I shouldn’t be > surprised, as this feeling isn’t really that new. I first felt like this, > when I turned thirty years old. How silly” >

    Liked by 1 person

  24. I’m constantly accused of ‘man eyes’. I’m not sure of the meaning, but my interpretation is a type of blindness that occurs upon opening a pantry door, or refrigerator (and it only happens to males). Otherwise, my eyesight is close enough to 20/20. The problem is most acute when hungry. Lots of items line the shelves but never anything to eat.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. If the fridge is full when this nasty affliction hits you, AJ., then the only explanation is sensory overload affecting the optic nerve! And the stress of an empty stomach! I say this with great seriousness, too. Are you out and about within your alloted 50 km from Bribie this weekend? I could visit your region, but feel the highways will be chock a block from all the folks with cabin fever. It is the long weekend, after all.

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  25. I can never find anything, I always have to ask my wife to help me look. She doesn’t have to look, she only has to say she is looking, then the faeries replace the item just where I looked first and where I knew it should be.

    Liked by 5 people

    1. When I lose something, I often find it in the first place I looked, just hiding under something. My first cursory look was the reason I couldn’t see it. By the time I have turned the house upside down and thoroughly checked every other place, I remember to go back to the first place, and there it is. I think that might be happening to you too.

      Liked by 1 person

  27. This dialog is priceless and applies with any woman/man dialogue preventing you’ve been living together for a few years!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  29. You made my Sunday morning. We have similar conversations and not just recently either. I’m sure they have been going on for our entire 33 years. I will check with My Good Wife to see if I am correct! 😀 😀

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    1. Haha, Woolly. It sounds like we are not the only ones! After 33 years, you must have found a way through this quagmire of conversation? What was your wife’s response?

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  30. Oh Amanda, thank you and all your readers for the lovely smiles, this is a wonderful post.:-D
    It sounds famiilar, we’re both being confronted with signs of getting older and sometimes it can be worrying, especially when you’re young at heart and feel nowehere the figures in your passport.;-)
    I absolutely love “Smiling is an art that comes from the heart and should be practised all the time.” It now shines on my calendar!
    Take care. x

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Dina, it was a wonderful yoga teacher, my first yoga teacher, who used to say that phrase, “Smiling is an art that comes from the heart and should be practised all the time.” I have not forgotten it in 30 years, but I definitely could practise it even more than I do. Thanks for making me smile that you like it too!

      Liked by 1 person

  31. Oh, bless! I remember seeing this in the Reader but didn’t have time to stop and read it, Amanda. And hoorah- glad I did because I never knew what Moth stood for. A guy who likes old jackets, I guess?

    Liked by 1 person

  33. Such an honest account of what life is, Amanda. As we get older, we tend to misplace things wonder where they are, and over time, we just learn to give up the hunt and one day that thing turns up. Some time ago getting older hit me – that time of life when you have to be more careful about your diet, your body becomes more sensitive about things around you, more visits to the doctor, paying more attention to what you spend, and also how you use your time. We change physically, mentally and even spiritually as we age, which usually isn’t a bad thing.

    I think we also learn to appreciate the everyday, boring things a lot more as time goes on, and also people. There’s the saying your circle of friends get smaller as you get older, and that is so true. People move on with their lives and their values and interests can be different to ours. I also think as we get older, we appreciate the time we have to ourselves a lot more.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. A beautifully summary of getting older, Mabel. Thank you for that. Younger people think their attitude, worries and priorities won’t change but every person that I have met, does have an epiphany on those big milestones in life. 30, 40 or 50. It is a time for us to reasses and plan the years ahead. I guess it is natural for goals to change as the world changes around us. The world is a vastly different place today, from what it was like when I left school, so it is natural that we change too. I could not be the same person or act in the same way I did when I left school. Thanks goodness! Lol!
      I wondered if you had given up on blogging altogether, as you hadn’t been posting for a while. I knew you were getting disenchanted but wasn’t sure if you would return! I am glad that you are here again!

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      1. I think when we’re young, we have all this energy that we feel invincible. But age does catch up with you even if you are healthy. We all have a different perspective when we get older and our priorities change, just as our needs and wants change.

        Yes, I haven’t been posting for a while. I think moving forward I think posting will be much fewer, and I will do it when I have time. It is great to see you here Amanda 🙂

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