We spend a lot of time in our own headspace, either at work or at home relaxing. In lockdown, some of us might be alone with our emotional thoughts, much more than we have ever experienced before.
This level of introspection, or mulling over problems, can get to a person, especially if they are a deep thinker or highly sensitive.
Concentration, Energy and Motivation
The extent to which we are occupied by our emotional-driven thoughts is often the extent to which energy is diverted away from our working memory, our concentration and motivation. We find it hard to concentrate on our work when we have something on our mind. The monkey mind, it is often called.
Caught Up in Our Emotions
We talk about being caught up in our emotions and it can feel like being trapped inside your own head. At these times, it is hard to re-focus on matters at hand. Our worry or frustration centres switch on and at times, go into, ‘overdrive.’
But those thoughts in our worry centre, are not reality-based thoughts. They are magnified, exagerrated, skewed or biased. We are so much more than those thoughts. Thoughts are not who a person is. Yet we give them power over our moods.
Just like a loud noise that bothers us, trying hard to block it out, will inevitably make the noise appear louder. This is because our focus on the noise has increased. We might even become angry and frustrated.
If we can’t remove the offending noise, we must decrease our focus in order to tolerate the annoying noise, or the many frustrations of our lives. If our attention is diverted away from focusing on the noise or the frustrations, we tend not to notice it and its persistence wanes.
Practising Mindful Strategies to Prevent Worry
Similarly, we can re-focus our attention away from the abyss of introspection, by practising ‘Mindfulness‘ techniques, which are designed to assist us in staying within the present moment. The only time we can act and live is right now, in the present moment. Everything else, the past and the future is only a construct of our minds, so focus on the here-and-now.
The Glennon Doyle and Buddha quotes may have been at odds, but one might assume their objectives were the same.
What do you think of this Sunday’s quotes?
Something to Ponder About 
Trying not to let stuff/noise/any trigger not affect one’s behaviour, is extrenely difficult. It takes so much energy to ignore it, that it actively aggravates the situation.
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That is it, Appeltjie. So much energy is expended ignorning it. Too much energy. So we cannot fight against the tide, but like a dangerous rip: we can surrender and swim with it for a while before diverting course for the shore.
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Amanda, I love the Glennon Doyle Melton banner, especially the end, “Show up anyways.” Showing up is half the battle. It reminds me of what a managerial professor once said to his son who wanted to know how to be successful – show up, show up on time and show up dressed to play (meaning wearing the right clothes and attitude). Keith
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Life is as simple and as complicated as that: Show up anyways with the right clothes and on time. The Danes who dislike anyone who is not punctual would wholeheartedly agree. But this advice goes further doesn’t it? It speaks to attitude – moping around, blaming, whinging gets on nowhere. Before social welfare, if we didn’t get off our butts, we didn’t survive. So most folks just got on with it. There is something in that.
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Amanda, the Danes have it right. I told a receptionist about her being consistently late. I said others are covering for you. You need to be aware if they do this enough, we may realize we don’t need you. Keith
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What was get reaction to this, Keith?
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I appreciate the quotes and would add that our emotions are important guides but difficult masters
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Such wise words, Derrick. Important guides but difficult masters. I like that. We cannot be a slave to our emotions unless we desire to become a nervous wreck, but I agree it is helpful to listen to the underlying message. Why are we feeling this way? What are we scared of? Hesitant of? Or excited about?
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Indeed
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The Buddha quote (which probably isn’t really a Buddha quote) is right on target. It is why forgiveness is so important in our trip through this life.
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Indeed. Much like every old religious teachings, it is heavily influenced by those who penned the words. Great point there, Dorothy. Who can truly live without forgiveness?
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hahaha thats 4am wake up time worry.. 😉
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I did very much like both quotes. Emotional thoughts often get us into a spin cycle. Been there, done that. Then I bought Byron Katie’s book “Loving What Is” I hated that book!! I hated it until I finished it and did the work. Was the most powerful work I’ve ever done and am still doing. When I took a class on it, I told the group I didn’t want to do the work. I was not done being “pissed” yet. 😉 An emotion that did not serve me. I still have my worn copy of her book. It will stay with me till the end of my time. No one has ever asked to borrow it either. 😉
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What a special book that sounds, Marlene. I will have to look it up so many thanks for mentioning it. We do have to process our anger, but can you clarify that the class was on the book?
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That second quote has me wrinkling my already-wrinkled brow, Amanda: I don’t get it.
The first one is a standard kind of aphorism one sees here and there – mostly within sites dedicated to “quotes”.
Do you see them paired in some way ?
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A person filled with anger can be messy and complicated, but the quote are not intrinsically linked, M-R. I liked both. Both pertain to character traits. The showing up is important in functioning despite those sometimes overriding emotional driven thoughts. I like that you were confused and that it made you question the post. My work is done!
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I loved this post. And I like both the sayings. Showing up is so so important for those in our lives and for those around us. We may not agree with their viewpoint at all times but, when people need us, even if they have not asked, we show up and we are there. I don’t know about the messy and complicated part but I agree with the showing up part. And the other quote: Holding on to anger can take up so much head space as you mentioned, and I think we have talked about this before in another post of yours. It takes away our energy and time and leaves us drained while actually not affecting the person our anger is aimed at! I am learning to not let such people and situations take away whatever little peace of mind I have. Interestingly enough, I recently came across a quote: ‘To avoid disappointment, accept people for who they are and not who they could be”. I cannot recollect where exactly I read this but it struck a note with me. Sounds simple, right?
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The following words are excellent, Moon. They take the pressure off us to be constantly striving to be better and smooth away those unrealistic expectations.
“I am learning to not let such people and situations take away whatever little peace of mind I have. Interestingly enough, I recently came across a quote: ‘To avoid disappointment, accept people for who they are and not who they could be”.”
This is marvellous. Take people as they are; if we take them as we want them to be, or could be, we are imposing OUR values onto them. They, just like us, are on a journey in life, and they may not have reached the same station that we have alighted on.
Thanks for your delightful comment and I love hearing from you, Moon.
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Mindfulness – easier said than done!
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Indeed but it does get so MUCH easier with practice. 10 minutes a day is all you need.
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