More Confidence ~ Sunday Quotes

“Low self-confidence isn’t a life sentence. Self-confidence can be learned, practiced, and mastered–just like any other skill. Once you master it, everything in your life will change for the better.” 

says Barrie Davenport. I wonder if Barrie has ever had problems with confidence himself? It is not easy for everyone to just ‘do confidence.’

Photo by Moose Photos on Pexels.com

But then Eleanor offers us her wisdom with a very grounding quote:

“You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.” –Eleanor Roosevelt

Andre Dubus, American writer of short stories, novels, and essays, thinks personality quirks and introversion contributes to how confidence a person might be.

“Shyness has a strange element of narcissism, a belief that how we look, how we perform, is truly important to other people.” ~ Andre Dubus

I know some shy people who would be horrified to think that they might be considered narcissist, but I do see what Andre means. In some cases, people who are shy are more internally focused than others. They may want to be accepted, included and to avoid social rejection, but falsely believe everything must be perfect in order to avoid a negative judgement. Accepting who they are can be incredibly empowering and inadvertantly increase self-confidence.

Having said all of that, if someone is content being shy and happy the way life is, that’s no problem at all.

Self-confidence can be crucial in professional sports as Arthur Ashe, Tennis pro points out:

“One important key to success is self-confidence. An important key to self-confidence is preparation.” –Arthur Ashe

The final comment comes from Eker, a motivational speaker. While somewhat inclusive it seeks to normalizes a lack of confidence alluding to attitude as being crucial. It offers some insight into combating and overcoming difficult emotions.

Successful people have fear, successful people have doubts, and successful people have worries. They just don’t let these feelings stop them.” –T. Harv Eker

Do any of these quotes speak to you?

Kafka’s story of Loss and Change in Berlin

It’s the Small Things

“At 40, Franz Kafka (1883-1924), who never married and had no children, walked through the park in Berlin when he met a girl who was crying because she had lost her favourite doll. She and Kafka searched for the doll unsuccessfully but Kafka told her to meet him there the next day and they would come back to look for her.

The next day, when they had not yet found the doll, Kafka gave the girl a letter “written” by the doll saying, “please don’t cry. I took a trip to see the world. I will write to you about my adventures.”

Thus began a story which continued until the end of Kafka’s life.

During their meetings, Kafka read the letters of the doll carefully written with adventures and conversations that the girl found adorable. Finally, Kafka brought back the doll (he bought one) that had returned to Berlin.

“It doesn’t look like my doll at all,” said the girl.

Kafka handed her another letter in which the doll wrote:

“My travels have changed me.”

The little girl hugged the new doll and brought the doll with her to her happy home. A year later Kafka died.

Many years later, the now-adult girl found a letter inside the doll. In the tiny letter signed by Kafka it was written:

“Everything you love will probably be lost, but in the end, love will return in another way.”

Embrace the change. It’s inevitable for growth.

Together we can shift pain into wonder and love, but it is up to us to consciously and intentionally create that connection.

A beautiful idea to help children deal with loss and change. A simple act that has so much meaning.

Letter, stories and books often are of help to children deal with strong emotions.

Quotes and Wisdom from the Past

“How much more anger and grief do than the things that cause them.”

“For you can’t lose either the past or the future; how could you lose what you don’t have?

“The impediment to action advances action.
What stands in the way becomes the way.”

Sayings and sageful words uttered in past centuries bear poignant relevance for modern communities across the world. Their timeless interpretation a general fit for a multitude of circumstances. Make of them what you will. Thanks to fermincazares for highlighting Marcus Aurelius’ wisdom.

Wisdoms and Words of Inspiration

Anyone can carry his burden, however hard, until nightfall.
Anyone can carry his burden, however hard, for one day ~
Robert L. Stevenson

Photo by Vodafone x Rankin everyone.connected on Pexels.com

Author Dale Carnegie commented on the high rate of hospital in-patients admitted for mental illness – almost half of all patients.

He noted:

…Too many people allow themselves to collapse under the crushing burdens of accumulated yesterdays and fearful tomorrows.

Dale Carnegie

Dale believed the cause of those crushing burdens to be the lack of awareness of living the ‘present moment.’ That is where we are living this very second you are reading this post.

It is but a small moment of time – an intersection between the millennia of the past and the future yet to be experienced.

Both Carnegie and Stevenson warn us we should accept life does not happen in the past so we cannot live there, nor can we live in the future. To attempt to do so causes anxiety and problems, which Dale believes causes issues physically and mentally.

He urges us to dispel worry about any blunders we made yesterday; to not spend those precious moments of time in a physical and mental hell by fretting about the future.

All we have is this precise moment before it slips through our fingers and is gone forever.

According to Dale, if we concentrate on living in the moment today, then better tomorrows will inevitably follow.

By all means, plan for tomorrow, he says, but do so without panic or regret.

Get the facts and push on from there.

Enjoy the good times for they never last.

Enjoy the bad times for they never last.

Thanks to Yvette from Priorhouse Blog for connecting me with the above wisdom.

Wordless Wednesday

Conflict and the Battle Within- Who wins? Old Indian Wisdom

Photo by patrice schoefolt on Pexels.com

An old Cherokee told his grandson,

“My son, there’s a battle between two wolves inside us all. One is Evil. It’s anger, jealousy, greed, resentment, inferiority, lies, and ego. The other is Good. It’s joy, peace, love, hope, humility, kindness, empathy, and truth.”

The grandson thought about it and asked his grandfather,

“Which wolf wins?”

The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”

Defining Happiness

Oscar Wilde said,

With freedom, books, flowers and the moon, who could not be happy?

George Burns, on the other hand, thought that happiness was

~having a large, caring, close-knit family in another city.”

Samuel Taylor Coleridge didn’t expect much – he theorized that happiness in life was made up of the little charities, a kiss or a smile, a kind look, a heartfelt compliment.

Whereas Aristotle agreed with Adams that: Happiness depends on ourselves.

The final word on happiness should go to Groucho Marx, who grasped the concept and the gift of living in the present moment.

I have just one day, today and I shall be happy in it.

Equanimity

Equanimity – my former yoga teacher used to mention it all the time. Trying to be the ‘equanimous’ person. What does that mean?

To my mind, it means someone who is really calm and composed.

Where does composure come from?

An understanding of the bigger picture. Not stressing the small items. Knowing that energy shifts and changes all the time. The good times never last and so it is with the bad times. Life goes on.

In Searching for Serenity – I host a photo and blog challenge with two other bloggers. This challenge runs until next Thursday, when a new prompt will be released. Click here for more details.